September 4, 2018
“GOOD Friday” intro by Kanye West, Common, Pusha T, Kid Cudi, Big Sean & Charlie Wilson [I remember Aaron paid me $5 in 2010 to download Kanye West’s “My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy” for him. This song was a promotional single for it.]
“The Prayer” outro by Kid Cudi [This song is off Cudi’s 2008 mixtape, which gained the attention of Kanye West & led to Cudi’s 2009 debut studio album, “Man on the Moon,” which Aaron gave me a poster of around the time of its release.]
This is the last recorded conversation I had with my cousin Aaron before he died on April 11, 2021 due to complications from open heart surgery. He called me from a bar at night after we had texted back and forth a bit that day. This wasn’t the first time he called me while drinking in public, which made me uncomfortable because of my own struggle with alcohol and cannabis dependency. But as two lonely humans seeking some sort of connection and support, we carried on. We discuss 1) Eminem’s new “Kamikaze” album, 2) Aaron’s finances & relationship struggles, 3) our efforts to stay busy, and 4) why I quit a job after the first week.
Aaron would’ve made a good podcast co-host. I tried to convince him for years to move to Cali with me or go into business with me. He was only 2 months younger than me, so to hear about his death was heartbreaking, but at the same time not entirely shocking. We grew up together and spent countless hours talking on the phone, playing sports and video games, watching movies, making each other laugh. We both joked about suicide & reckless living a lot because we both grew tired of the pain & struggles of life, which led to us neglecting some of our physical and mental health.
Obituaries don’t mention if someone had been a bully or was drinking heavily to cope or had DUIs or was surrounded by enablers and negative influences. I have a lot of really fun memories with him, but I also have a lot of bad memories too. It became difficult for me to connect with him in high school and after graduation, and we drifted apart. He moved to Texas about a year after I moved out to California. I always rooted for him to overcome his struggles and hoped that one day we’d emerge victorious together. I’ll miss him deeply. RIP A.M.H.
A couple years ago Aaron gave me permission to post some of the conversations we recorded. Part of the reason this show exists is to hopefully educate, through transparency, to help prevent the worst and strive for the best by discussing things openly. Aaron battled with a growing dependency on alcohol, which is a sign of depression and instability. The first step is acknowledging the root-and-results of your struggle with a behavior, then learn about it and implement adjustments with the help of those who support your evolution and journey to get healthier. Keep fighting for the good in life that we know can exist.
Audio samples created & owned by their original license holders. Episode titles, audio recordings, & photos are from the day of recording or closest proximate date. The show is edited, written, produced, directed, & created by David Kato.
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